ONE. know the reason why i retake my nlevels instead of going ite whereas i could opp to go higher nitec?

because of my family, ziyad and friends.

retaking my nlevel was never in my option.

you encourage me to retake. i could still remember you even told me "just retake. we are here for you. to guide you. to accompany you when ever if i were to feel alone."

but nw,

where were you when the day comes?

when the day i really need you guys.

you dont even bother to EVEN wish me luck right?

seriously. if i were to done anything wrong.

tell me.

what would you possibly get if you keep it among yourself?

so you wanna keep it and drag till when? next year?

easy for you.

i swear, you nvr know what it feels like to be me this year.

easy for you, cusz you got friends.

.

..

TWO. i thought you gonna be there for me. like you said in the beginning of the year.

i could still remember in the early months.

when you're having c-o-n-f-l-i-c-t-s with your friends.

i know i WAS THERE FOR YOU.

i texted you asking if you're okay or not.

i hang out with you and phone you.

and you told me you were pretending. i agree.

but now?

i guess you're pretending to me.

lemme repeat, TO ME.

and when you're back with your friends.

who am i?

i dont even know who am i to you.

you didnt phone/text me.

*have fun guessing

you might not know im refering to you.

and

you also might not know im NOT refering to you.

.

..

THREE. exams are around the corner. i cant set my mind straight.

im gonna private this lola-dick sooon.

thank you.

.

..

FOUR. WHO AM I TO YOU ANYWAY?